She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Randomize