Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
