just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
