their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Randomize
