She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
the liver wants what the liver wants
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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