my phone needs a breathalizer
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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