some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize