people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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