And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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