Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I have tasted many bathrooms
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
