u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Everyone says I win the strip club
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
