just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Randomize
