i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
Less talking, more tequila
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
