Screwed.edu
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize