Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize
