The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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