butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize
