He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I would fuck him just for his dog
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
