Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Randomize
