I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
