your room smells of hookers.
And success
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Randomize
