Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Randomize
