are you so shy because you have an std?
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
