The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
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