You're completely useless in the revolution.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
