yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Randomize
