I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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