i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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