I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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