I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
