Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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