Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
