she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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