doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Randomize
