I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Little spoons don't ask big questions
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
