Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
