Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
