brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Bring me that man meat
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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