marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I DEMAND FORESKIN
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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