Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
