This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize
