Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
This girl is more easily done than said...
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
