He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
