Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
This is the high leading the old right now
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
