Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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