We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
