its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
