He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
