good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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