He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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