Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
