I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
