whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
